by Deb Schnitta
Relationships
offer the deepest place of sustenance to us as human beings. Together,
whether in a partnership of two or a group of thousands, we can
accomplish much more than we can as solitary beings. We come together
and share ideas, gain momentum from one another and enjoy the creative
actions of shared energy. We also find the places of unhealed
consciousness that exist within each of us, those that would not be
apparent were there not another individual to connect with, to disagree
with or to love.
When we move from solitary action we step into
the area of evolution. Here we test our defenses and strategies whether
or not we intend to look inward at our choices in a conscious way. By
being in proximity to another person with thoughts, feelings and
history, we change the playground of our own creations. It may be
through enjoying the company of another that we seek out connection and
step beyond a previous place of comfort. It may be that through the
lens of a friend that we learn about ourselves in ways we could not,
looking through our own eyes.
To reap the riches of
relationship is part of the path of evolution. To learn to be, to truly
express who we are as beings of spirit infused in bodies of thought,
emotion, and history is part of the path of enlightenment. It is part
of the path of living a life of joy here now.
Nothing serves as
a greater mirror than connection with an intimate other. Whether this
is a child that questions your authority as he or she seeks to author
their own authority, or a sibling that plays a role in a long rehearsed
and not yet conscious dance of engaging and isolation, connection with
another opens the mirror to your own Soul in ways one could not
experience alone. To learn patience opens the opportunity for
non-attachment. To learn cooperation opens the opportunity for
co-creation.
Patience and cooperation are tools of the
personality. They allow us to develop greater range of connection with
others, greater capacity to experience smooth and harmonious
relationships. Non-attachment and co-creation are tools of the Soul.
They are qualities of action that exist when the Soul is present and
has the ability to create. Often they require the mind, the habits of
the personality to be soft enough to reach for a moment of ease, to let
go of old patterns of being right, of struggle or reinforcing the ego.
In short, a moment of surrender for the old opens a great glimpse into
the depth of the capacity of the Soul.
As we transition from
ego based choices to ones that come from a higher perspective the
choices of the personality do not simply disappear. The choices now
arise from balance, from a win-win strategy rather than winning over
another. Each time we learn to create in this way, we reaffirm our
commitment to ourselves, our larger selves. We step outside duality and
open to living life from higher flows. Along the way daily life becomes
more joyful, more abundant and more love filled.
Each action we
take infused in this way allows the parts of our personalities that
have not yet learned to open freely to simply take a breath. No longer
a struggle for survival, we observe the ease that transpires in a given
situation and our curiosity nudges us forward. We may wait, observing
over and over again before this single aspect of our personality feels
confident enough to step outside its defense. We may simply enjoy the
freedom of the lack of tightness that has arisen.
As the
personality accumulates more and more experiences of this nature, it
begins to seek out the opportunity to live unencumbered. It yearns for
connection in deeper ways. It seeks guidance from higher flows and it
opens to creating from this place of inspiration. Words like purpose
and ease begin to take center stage for the mind. No longer operating
under the illusion that the personality must know everything to have a
plan, greater capacity to realize the Soul’s contributions begin to
become known. Here the personality begins to become Soul infused. It
still has likes and dislikes, it still has dreams and fears, but it
also realizes it has access to strength and wisdom far beyond its own
life experiences. If curious enough, the personality will seek out ways
to consciously connect with this larger loving presence. Through
meditation and quiet, the mind begins to open to the depths of
untouched potential. It returns here freely to pause from how it thinks
things should be, and explores other options it would not have created
on its own.
As the mind starts to open in this way it creates
the opportunity for ease to be present in the changes that transpire.
When the mind is tight and holding onto how it thinks or fears things
will be, it slows the rate of growth and establishes a foothold in an
imagined battle. Often in this moment a pattern from the past has
arisen from the stores of consciousness of life experiences and has
begun expressing itself. The forward momentum stops, the personality
regroups and through a process that remains largely unconscious, slips
back into the old and familiar.
Each time the personality has
the opportunity to move in and out of the process of choice, it learns
that it can co-exist with the larger flows, the Soul. Joy begins to
emerge as the personality recognizes the power from within, the union
of the personality with this higher wisdom. Without the personality the
Soul would have little impact. Without the Soul the personality would
be limited to create from one aspect of a palette, creating new
expressions that closely mimicked others. Both are suitable paths of
learning.
The Soul as a wise and loving part of us simply waits.
It trusts that when the personality is ready it will open to what is
next. The Soul as an extension of our larger consciousness does not
recreate old patterns from the past, but recognizes that it will be
part of that dance regardless. Each time the personality opens to a
larger stream of consciousness the opportunity for transformation
occurs. This may be the deepening of the ability to ask for help. It
may be the capacity to wait and not move into action while larger
streams of flow come together. It may be the risk to open to deeper
love. The Soul as witness to this beautiful part of evolution supports
this transformation through its presence. When we align here, we feel
the support, we recognize the opportunities and we find the capacity to
speak from wisdom far beyond our minds. In a moment of grace we have
touched the Divine.
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